When Hollywood gets it all wrong; why Whedon’s Avengers will suck the big one (smirk)

Posted: February 10, 2012 in Uncategorized
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Bad acting is apparently the underlying rule for Hollywood casting crews, starting in the late 1980’s and culminating into the  complete dog shit we have today. We’ve had the brat pack who developed some acting skills by the mid 90’s, followed by some of the ugliest f***kin’ people you’ve ever seen. Watching the shows and movies these people are in is like watching the Special Olympics (or a Johnny Knoxville movie) . You look at them, listen to them repeat their lines; they don’t make you crack even the tiniest smile or make you feel the least bit entertained. They represent the Hollywood ideologues’ version of the modern teenage smart-mouth.  You see these Scooby Doo turds listed in the credits and you just shake your head in disbelief that you spent precious moments of your life watching these people talk.

Who casts these people? Who told these people they could “act?”  Do you understand almost 150 episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer aired between 1996 and 2003 and actually employed the worst batch of “actors” that ever existed? Do you even have to try to be on  Hollywood’s B-list?

  

Should we blame the scruffy Joss Whedon for introducing us to such shitty story plots, asinine facial expressions,and a batch of horrible cheap actors that should only serves as body doubles in a zombie movie? Yes. We must hold Whedon accountable for his California-based creations. Not one of Whedon’s characters have one iota of soul or redeeming value whatsoever. They are full of typical misplaced California rich-kid condescension; if you met one of them in real life you would be immediately arrested for instinctively kicking their smirking faces in.

Bruce Willis, now that baby boomer can hold a smirk…

Perhaps Joss Whedon’s machinations won’t survive into the next decade and die off in the Betty Ford Clinic. Better yet to just fade away to obscurity. Hollywood continues the Resurrection of Whedon’s Firefly and other asshole series, though. Please put them on at 4 am in the morning so we don’t get a glimpse of them during waking hours.

                    

“Can I play Cyclops or something? I’m hungry.”    Whedon and the Bad Actors Guild.

Unfortunately, Hollywood has let the Master of Assholes take the helm on the much anticipated Marvel franchise, the Avengers.  Whedon casts assholes; Whedon coaches his actors to be the driest, must un-interesting Californian they can muster. Robert Downey’s soulest coke induced eyes are perfect for Whedon’s dream of the superhero, because they convey no emotion nor empathy after years in Los Angeles County lock down. Nick Fury is not a two syllable crack head in the comics; Jeffery Dahmer would never be allowed to carry a bow and arrow. Johansson… well does she actually “act?”

Avengers ASS-embled 2012 -coming to lower your low budget expectations this summer.

Let’s break it down for you. First, the superheroes’ egos causes them to fight each other, then join together to save New York City. Nick Fury, played by a man with a 3rd education and vocabulary capability, leads them into battle against galactic invaders. In all fairness, smirks, smart-ass remarks, dry wit chagrins, all typical of a Joss Whedon movie, will have to be weighed against the CGI and special effects before a final verdict is in. Mark our words, though, you will hate all the characters, except the Hulk. In Whedon’s world you want the Space Invaders to win and start over with the human race, beginning in Hollywood, California and preferably in Whedon’s hometown.


Comments
  1. fitz46 says:

    OK, I can agree with most of this diatribe against Joss Whedon and I find Nicholas Brendan, Nathan Fillion, Robert Downey (among others) to be shockingly talentless but to claim that the whole of the cast of Buffy the Vampire Slayer sucks is cutting too broad a stroke. I make no claim to be an out-of-control fanatic but I think you really must not include Anthony Head and James Marsters in your grouping of bad actors. These guys have obvious talent if not good decision making skills when it comes to picking roles. Maybe new agents are in order.

    • Mad Max says:

      They all suck especially skinny Euro-punk James Marsters.
      Not one of them is a leading man; not one of them is a leading woman.
      Not one of them has one molecule of talent.
      You can tell by their empty Robert Downey, Jr. eyes as they read their lines.
      They are assholes in real life and they play assholes on screen.

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