Nicolas Cage must be completely broke

Posted: January 25, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

Drive Angry, the movie you hate to love.

When you first see the trailers to Drive Angry in the corner of your eye, you think, “here we go again, Nick Cage in a fast car with a hot chick going to kick some revenge ass, this time in Redneckville…” The trailer to Drive Angry looks like a cheesy souped-up version of Gone in 60 Seconds meets Bangcock Dangerous. You assume the movie will suck as much. It does.

You are intrigued when the movie starts up in full-blown Rated Hard R for Violence, as Cage blasts appendages off random white trash chasing him around in fast cars. Cool!

Like his career, Nicolas can’t be killed? WTF?!

Was this the throw away script to Ghost Rider 2?

Then the movie takes a weird plot twist into the supernatural. Nicolas Cage plays John Milton, agent of hell on a quest to save his infant granddaughter from the hands of trailer park Satanists trying to sacrifice her to the Lords of the Underworld (not the band- the ones in Hades). What a leap in story-telling!

  

The movie has the hot chick throwing F-Bombs, the FBI agent from Hell and assortment of hepatitis infected meth-heads dying to eat a random silver bullet.

This movie is so goddamn stupid words cannot describe it. Money was actually spent on it. We don’t know what else to say.

Good God Almighty this a dumb movie.

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